Wednesday, 28 November 2012

The Impossible Crime!

Welcome to Meta-City One!
Crime Level: Crime is Crime and will be dealt with

This is Cid Vid Broadcasting, I am Huw Solo, here is the news.

Good Morning. Science news...Lowundai-Zamussi SA have announced that the world's first car-washing machine hybrid is ready to drive. Prototypes are being tested on the streets of Hamilton HabZone and citizens are invited to arrange to take one out for a spin.

The Justice Dept remains tight lipped over the attack on the HiSec armoured car, as yet there have been no reports on what was taken though sources close to the Mayor's office have been looking for a missing bill of lading for the new.....and meanwhile we have reports of a HIGH SPEED chase ....

<<<<<cut to vid>>>>>
Sterling Moss Freeway 1116 MCT - Judges on lawhogs hit the BOOST button as the hemipowered V10 screams down the boulevard; sirens wail but the renegade refuses to pull over!
"Bike: Guns to motion tracker", growls Judge Blake. 
The V10's drive is shredded and it lurches to a halt. But...."It's EMPTY, it was on AUTODRIVER!!"

 Aldrin PublicOverwalk 1118MCT; a gang of Diamond Dogs hold up a pair of law abiding civs.
"Give up the creds, nofurs", "That briefcase - I'll have that too", "Woooff!"
"Here, Col, I dont think these little fellas are housetrained"
"Too right Rayy, lets give them their BOB MARTINS."
Everyone pulls metal but the Dogs are outclassed - their bullets BOUNCE off the civs and...."DROKKIN CATFIRE! TENTACLES!" "LEGGIT"
The Dogs but

But the LAW is QUICKER!
"Aston to Control, three for the pad-wagon. Tell Blake that HOT LEAD says that two SUSCIVS matches for BOLOS RAYY and COL are headed for Docking Bay 52. Aston Out."

Document Control, Meta City DownPort 1129MCT
"Papers in order, Mr Romalpa. Head over and collect your goods."
"But Mr Grimsdale, thats not cleared, and the Judges..."
"Stan, its an original clean bill of lading - they own it"
"Thanks guys, c'mon Mr Romalpa...."
"OK, Col"
"Aw, spit!"

"HALT! You are under ARREST!"
"Nah, not us mate - look this bit of paper, it says..."
"These are not the intergalactic aliens criminals we're looking for. Have a good 'un sport."
"Cheers mate"
"Sydney Nolan! That psychic paper works, Col!"

BRRRMMMMM! BRRRRRRRRMMM! Lawhog engines HOWL as Judges Blake and Aston THUNDER to the scene of THE CRIME OF THE YEAR!

Judge Blake fires at the FREE TRADER BEERWULF as it lifts off and then switches on
"They. Are. UNDER ARREST!" roars Blake.

Next: The Clampdown - Judges hit the streets to fight crime and bring ORDER TO THE CHAOS!!
Lawhogs! Bike Cannon! Firepower! THRILL CARNAGE OVERLOAD!

Dogs - RAFM
Judges - 15mm
Civs - The Scene & GZG
Ship - not a clue
Rules - Killozap
inspiration - Hitchhikers, Sweeney, Dr Who, Star Wars

Blorg note - Psychic paper does not exist. That's what it says here. 



Tuesday, 20 November 2012

The Trojan Hovercar


"This is Cit-Vid News, Broadcasting on Pirate Satellite. I am Huw Solo, here is the news.

Good afternoon. The extreme flooding in the lower reaches of Bonham Sector has finally been brought under control; levels are dropping and mo-pads have been able to raise their grav-anchors. It seems that the levee had not broken but that the crisis was due to a freak boring malfunction when Super-Artesian GmBh were drilling for water. They found it. AqSupDep have confirmed that at least FIVE habzones have a clean water supply for about ten years. A spokesman for Super-Artesian said "all's well that ends well".

The violence in Detroit Towers continues and we can confirm that it has spilled out onto the streets as this vid clip shows......

......cut to vid feed.....

Expressway 95, near Detroit Towers 14.37 MCT.
Crims are shooting at Diamond Dogs fleeing the scene of a failed CredChip dispenser robbery.
Civ vehicles dart at speed around the lumbering Hi-Sec PLC armoured car.
With a HOWL of turbocharged thrusters, JUDGES on lawhogs POWER to the shootout.
"Bike: Guns to track mass target."

Lawbikes fire bikecannon into the crims; zap guns fire back but the rounds PING off the armoured bikes..."LETS CUFF SOME PERPS", snarls Judge Scully.

Judge Blake drops a perps with a well aimed Lawmaker round, Scully's bike cannon SHRED the crim gangers and the rest flee or give up to the Judges - "Control - 5 for the ISOCUBES. Get the Pad-Wag here STAT....CONTROL? CONTROL?"
"Comms are DOWN, Blake. High Rad count in upper atmo - local and limited. ITS A MINI EMP!"

.>>>>>>>.......<<<<<<<<<<<...,,,,78787error 959.......>>>>>>>>

"And we seem to have lost contact with the vidcam feed there but we are just accesing "SkyEye via a trapdoor feed and visuals in 5, 4, 3, 2 ,1.....LIVE"

Expressway 95, near Detroit Towers 14.39 MCT.
A V10 Partizan has pulled up in front of the Hi-Sec. Two ALIENS have stepped off the sidewalk! The multi-eyed one has fired a grenade into the upper atmos and the one with the tentacled head has just FIRED a TANK KILLER at the rear hatch of the Hi-Sec.....
A gas grenade goes in and in goes the multi-eyed alien and he's out with a briefcase and their off! Smoke bombs all over the Expressway, Judges unable to respond and......the two aliens HAVE DISAPPEARED!!!!
This is the CRIME OF THE WEEK!

 "Citizens, have you seen these alien criminals?"
"No Judge. They're pretty distinctive"
"Hmmm. Carry on your business Citizens"

"SIDNEY NOLAN! Col, I thought she had us"
"Shuttit, Rayy, just smile, keep walking and don't DROP the briefcase!".  

Col - a three eyed chook armed with a 30mm Purdey SemiAuto
Rayy - an Octohead armed with a H&K PanzerKnacker and 12mm hand cannon
The Vehicle is a Racing Green V10 Partizan
They speak with a Forexx accent
WANTED FOR: Illegal EMP use, illegal Tank Killer use, illegal gazbomb use, theft, grand theft, dangerous driving, driving without insurance, ignoring legal traffic codes, being alien, making Judges look stupid. If you see them CALL A JUDGE!
Thank you. Have a lower crime day.

Perps & Civs - GZG (Maj Mike)
Dogs - Citadel (Artmaster)
Judges - Painted to order
Vehicles - GZG, Old Crow,
Rayy & Col - - converted by me. Green stuff galore.
Maps - SWM & HOF
Rules- KilloZap
Inspiration: see below

Blorg note: EMPs should not be used without adult supervision. A prize* to any reader who tells me who these two alien jokers were inspired by.
*value if any to be decided, may be nominal,pontless or honorific. Legal Small Print** applies.
** I'm right, you're wrong.


Friday, 9 November 2012

Hell St Blues

Welcome to Meta City One
Crime Level: All Time High

"This is Huw Solo with Cit-Vid News broadcasting from Orbit. Good evening.

Firstly, local news. The fall out from the Meg-Aqua World Scandal continues; investors have lost millions of credits with the revelation that the scheme to build floating HabZones on the Outer Gordon Banks was a pyramid selling scam. DA of HabArea12, Brendan Grabbit said "It was a complete fraud, its amazing no one thought it even a bit fishy".  

The appearance of Judges on the streets has led to a minor decrease in crime but day by day the new guardians of law and order face a brutal our latest vid clip shows.....

......cut to vid......

Its a bad day to be a civ on Hill St - the Uggly Mutt streetgangers pick on some innocent law abiding cits - "dump the credit chip, chump" growls Spivey. "LOOKOUT!Its the rustfilth!"
"CEASE AND DESIST! CEASE AND DESIST!" .... DroidCops respond - their programming detecting crime, violence and a potential shakedown.
BLAM! BLAM! Stutter guns bark and gauss guns spit plasteel DEATH! The poor civs dive for cover.....

The Perps trade shots with the DroidCops; a crim is BLOWN AWAY by hammering gauss shells.....but in the distance is the ROAR of LAWHOGS!
"Bike: slave cannon to helmet-cam. Fire."
BDDDDAP!BDDDAP! A DroidCop is hammered into SHRAPNEL by a hail of bikecannon slugs!

"Eat LAWBOOT, Creep!"
Judge Blake gives an Uggly Mutt a patrolboot denture.

The fight takes it's toll. Judge Scully stands off and RAKES the DroidCops with her bike cannon.
"Bike: Cover me".....BAM BAM BAM! Judge Blake dismounts and DRILLS perps with accurate lawmaker rounds.......a zap gun round pings his shoulder pad and Blake sets his gun to "Perptracker" the perp legs it, the round homes in on him....SCRATCH one CRIM!

BAM! THUD! Judge Scully drops one perp and COLLARS another with her streetbaton. Just behind her Judge Blake slaps the flexicuffs on an arrestee - "its the timestretcher for you, PERP."

On one street, one walkway, there is LAW.
But CRIME does not stop and neither can the Judge....

"Citizen Kane, I dont like your tanktop but you're free to go. Citizen Rossi, that library book, it's overdue........."

Judges - (supplied painted)
Droids - Khurasan
Perps - GZG (Maj Mike)
Civs - ditto
Map - SWM
Rules - KillOZap
Inspiration - Dredd3D, Hill St Blues

Blorg note: LawHogs are manufactured by HarleySturmovik PLC.

NEXT: City Crime Task Force vs Judge Blake.....Thrill level set to IMPOSSIBLE!!



Thursday, 8 November 2012

Crime: The Tide is HIGH

Welcome to Meta City One
Crime level : Extreme

"This is Cit-Vid broadcasting from orbit; this is Huw Solo, here is the news.

Weather Control have confirmed that the radiation clouds over the Whedon Zone have been dispersed; citizens are advised to report to Rad-Con for screening if concerned......

.....We have breaking traffic news, a gang of bikers are driving at speed all along the Watchtower Overway. More later as it happens......

In the Jefferson Heights Sector, the giant inflatable Harry Hamster moored to JulesVern Towers has sprung a leak and collapsed, much to the dismay of the younger population. A Harry Hamster PLC spokesman said "yes, we are all a bit deflated".

We have more news on that biker gang; they are moving fast into Central and are splitting up. DroidCops are allegedly responding. Caution is advised.

Meanwhile we bring live coverage of an incident on East St and DeVito in Central.....

......cut to public vid cam.....

Tilly Salzman a witness to the brutal excesses of the DroidCops is being harassed by the City Crime Task Force. ......"You've cooperated with the DA, Salzman, we're taking you in -and you can  empty that credit chip to cover your legal expenses"

"What the grok?"...... "Who the freak are you?"......"Zok it! Slot the wannabe!"

"Bike: Cover me"

"I am Judge Blake ..... And there WILL BE  Law! If you resist arrest......."
 Bullets FLY on East Street as the law is brought down hard. The CCTF are blown away by Lawmaker rounds. Case: closed.

Justice is here, it is swift....... and Creeps? There is nowhere to HIDE!

Next: Hell St Blues - thrills set to stun as the Judges hit the streets

Cheers Maff

CCTF - Khurasan
Tilly - GZG (Major Mike)
Judge Blake - (painted to order)
Map - SWM
Rules - KillOZap
Inspiration: C'mon. Do I have to spell it OUT Creep?

Blorg Note: A free entry visa to Moonbase Titan for any reader who spots all the references in this news cast.

Wednesday, 31 October 2012

Crime coverage!

Welcome to Meta City One!
Crime Level: Rising rapidly

"This is Meta City VidNews broadcasting from Orbit, with the news you won't be told. My name is Huw Solo. Good Morning.

We start with the news that the theft of hundreds of old watches from Gruber's Museum of Chronography was faked in a desperate bid for publicity. Museum Director Otis B Driftwood admitted today that "it was a complete wind up."

Mmmm. News? Mayor Brumby's City Crime Task Force continues to clamp down on opposition groups and in totally unrelated incidents, admission to MedAid units have hit an all time high.

We have accessed publicvid cams and know bring you a taste of life on the streets......

............cut to cam feed.............

Outside Broccoli Towers, Citizens go about their business....

"If anyone of you drokking drokkers move, I'll vapourise every last gonk drokking one of ya!"
The Ugly Mutts street gang arrives and things go mutieward real fast....

"Cease and Desist! Cease and Desist!"
DroidCops arrive on the scene, gauss cannon set to AUTO FIRE

Bullets fly as the DroidCops issue arrest warrants the hard way.
The perps use the civs as shields; one perp is ripped by gauss shells, as is his hostage; Miss Tilly the Engineer slips off and RUNS!

"Unauthorised and suspiciously fleeing a crime scene, you are arrested, convicted and sentenced. Will carry out SENTENCE on the spot!"

"Not today, ruster. You're revoked."
Nathan Strange, Droid Hunter enforces copyright via smartgun.....

Strange and Heen Junt step up to defend the civilians from the ROGUE LAW DROIDS
"The witnesses are under arrest until their evidence is certified. You will stand down! Cease and Desist!"
"Come and get gun is hungry......"
The Droid hunters take down the DroidCops in a HAIL of slugs while the citizens hide. 

This is the news - This is Meta City One - where the law lies bleeding."

Civs - GZG (Maj Mike)
Perps - GZG (Maj Mike)
Droids - CMG
Strange -
Junt - Khurasan
Map: SWM
Rules: KilloZap
Inspiration: Judge Dredd case files 4; "Know your rights" The Clash

Blorgg note: Evidence provided by DroidCop needs no corroboration - see City vs John Doe case5567vB 2079

Friday, 26 October 2012

Here is the news!

Welcome to Meta City One!
Crime Level: Acceptable!

"Hi! This is Meta-Brekfast News, I'm AMy your Breakfast Buddy and do we have the News for YOU!!

And here's the weather - fine! All day! Reports of radiation clouds over the Whedons are totally unreliable. Whedons residents are free to go for a walk whenever they want, just do it indoors!

Time for business news.....Horace Blimp, notorious and alleged employee rights activist, threw himself onto the production line at the Magni-Visaid factory. He was rushed to a public med-aid booth; a Magni-Visaid LegalRep said later, "Mr Blimp was only making a spectacle of himself."

And now over to our LIVE vid of the take down of Meta-Cit News Studios by the City Crime Task Force. As you know, Huw Solo and his rabble of news-liars have been spreading complete falsehoods about Meta-City One. Today they were brought to JUSTICE.....

......cut to live vid feed....

Thrill as the CCTF move up through the corridors

GASP as stacked up CCTF Troopers CRASH into action - GO! GO! GO!
A green haired arty hippy from the Graphics Dept tries to stop them. The slacker manages to SHOOT CCTRed1 before he is SLAMMED by Kompact-ACR rounds!

Its SOLO! SLOT HIM! Hey, CCTRed3 - GET UP! You're only....oh. MEDIC!!

If you see this man DO NOT ask for his autograph. DO call the Authorities, if you have a gun you can SHOOT him. There is a BOUNTY. HE IS A CRIMINAL!

THERE HE GOES! Solo runs for it through the VidStudio; holokits SHATTER as slugs fly!
He's in the ducts! Solo is a desperate rat in a trap!

Go! Go! ...... BAM! BAM! Blaster Rounds tear up the ducts. Gorman.....Gorman??

Target in the OPEN! FREE FIRE!

A misguided citizen throws his lot in with Solo. Shooters dive for cover as HOTLEAD and FLAMING plasma hammers across the Landing Pad. LANDING PAD?? CCTFACTUAL to all CALLSIGNS - he's doing a RUNNER!!

Its a 360' MAELSTROM of gunfire! Solo leaps for the hatch and grabs the unknown citizen on board just as a CCTF round NAILS him. Turbojets WHINE and THRUM as the MILLENIUM NOVA reaches lift off velocity.......bullets ping off the hull........<<<<picking up remote audio>>>>> "Jocko? Jocko? Gorram it! Control to manual. Slaving nose cannon to visual.......DAKADAKADAKADAKADAKA! NavComp - set course for ORBIT. Broadcast on all Media. Good Morning, This is Huw Solo. Here is the News, today in Meta City One, the LAW DIED ...."

Thrill Monitor Meltdown Predicted!

CCTF: Khurasan
Civ & Design Guy: GZG (Major Mike)
Solo: FOW German tankie heavily converted
Map: SWM
Rules: KilloZap
Inspiration: "Time" - ELO

Blorrg Note: Do not offer to "stack up" in Meta-City bars.  


Monday, 22 October 2012

Nathan Strange: Droid Hunter - CORNERED!!

Welcome to Meta City One
Crime Level: All Time High

Cit-Vid News at Seven
Your Newscaster: Huw Solo

"Good Evening. There may some interuption to this evening's programme as our studios are currently under assault by the City Crime Task Force. We have exclusive coverage of Nathan Strange's one man's war against the Droid Cops but first, Sports News.

The final game of the KillerBall season between the Lorne Green Packers and the Canavaral Vikings at New Lambeau Violence Drome had to be stopped when, in a freak accident, the Zero-G was turned on.
A spokesman for the Meta City KillerBall League said that "the match will be replayed but right now it's all up in the air."

Excuse me.....intruders on Level 3. Taking direct control of corridor defences - all staff beware, danger close, I repeat DANGER CLOSE....."


And now, back to the News, where we....BREACH! BREACH! ACTIVATE PLAN B. ALL STAFF, PLAN B.....we are cutting to vid during a short intermission......."

................Cut to live blog feed.........

Nathan Strange is pinned down in a turbolift as a DroidCop lashes rounds through the doorway, "Drok it, those rusters are stacking up out there" mutters Strange as he releases his .477 boot gun.....suddenly.....

Droid Cops are sent flying in a HAIL of AP shot from a XM95 Avalanche rotary shotgun!

"Who the drell are you?"
"Heen Junt - your DCI*, it's 19.73, I'm 'avin....'oops, there's another one of 'em..."

"Illegal weapon discharge! Illegal weapon discharge! Await Justice peacefully!"
DroidCop reinforcements close in......"Eat lead, TINNIES" snarls Strange as he and Junt pull metal and HAMMER them with shotgun and deadly boot gun rounds. Shards of Droid pepper the walls in armour-piercing MAYEM!
"Thirsty work, retiring droids" says Strange, "The Hoverdriver's Arms is open...."


Strange: Laserburn
Droids: CMG
Junt: Khurasan
Map: SWM
Rules: KilloZap
Inspiration: Life on Mars, Bladerunner
*Blargg note - DCI, Dangerous Circumstance Insurance - "Guaranteed Lethal Support within the Minute or your credits back."

Saturday, 20 October 2012

Corridor War in Detroit Towers!

Welcome to Meta City One
Crime Level: No banks robbed in last hour
Your newscaster: Huw Solo

"Good afternoon. The headline - Cit-vid has infiltrated a media-tech commando into Detroit Towers - exclusive coverage of a brutal three way firefight follows.

In other news, a hov-van carrying ball bearings has shed its load on the Sector 12 Eight Lane. A spokesman for The Highways Dept has said that traffic will be kept rolling.

Meanwhile, members of the Mayoral Criminal Task Force have closed in around the Cit-Vid Studios in order to close down our broadcasts......Excuse me while I fit my combat goggles and anti-gas nose plugs.....more on that as it happens. Now, over to our Urban Combat Camera Crew at Detroit Towers..... " 
.................Cut to Live vid feed......

 Burp gun armed Perps advance on a Diamond Dog held admin block.

 The mercs open fire with gauss carbines, Big Dog 1st Class G'frrk nails a crim with a well aimed blast from his Pacifier Hand Cannon.

 Droid Cops serials ZX81 and ZX82 respond to the scene, rapid fire gauss cannon at the ready. "Cease and desist! Cease and desist!"

 Bullets TEAR and fly in all directions! The Diamond Dogs are RIPPED by the Gauss cannons of the Droid cops while the perps settle a few scores too. The Dogs PANIC and run for it.......
 .......apart from one. G'frrk double taps a perp and spins around, HAMMERING round after round into ZX81; the drioid falters, armour weakened critically!

His hand cannon clicks to empty....G'frrk  ducks to reload. Bobby Uggly puts a .55 slug into him at point blank range "take that dog breath" snarls the crim as G'frrk slumps to the gound!

The droid cops form up and stalk forward, their cannons SPIT gauss slugs into the perps. Bobby Ugly goes down hard, shredded by gauss rounds. The crims fire madly but burp, zap and stutter gun shots just PING off of the droids......"Drok it, we're GRONKED!" screams a perp.....

The crims are shot to pieces by the hail of fire but a full mag of burp gun shells TEARS into ZX81's hull and sets off a chain reaction on its ammo....KRABOOOOM.... scratch one droid

ZX82 guns down the remaining perps. The metal beast is king of Floor12 - only 128 more to go.....

Dogs - Ral Patha (Artmaster)
Perps - GZG (Maj Mike)
Droids - CMG
Map - SWM Cloud City
Rules: Killozap
Inspiration: Terminator, Jailbreak, The Wild Bunch

Warning: Gauss cannon are military grade weapons. Photo ID required for purchase.

NEXT BULLETIN- Strange claims on his INSURANCE! Thrill Meter in OVERLOAD!